The mind of Rant

I am so delightfully happy at the moment, and I have no idea why!

Fri, 01 Jun 2012 10:32:05 -0500

Although: I had a FANTASTIC breakfast, which consisted of scrambled eggs, cheese, and a spinach tortilla and grapes on the side.

I had a very large cup of very strong coffee.

I get to go food shopping today

I’m planning on going to work out in the next hour or so

And I’m being evil to a certain fictional character.

Not him. I killed him.

This one.

~~i use this one because it looks like Alex is approving of her suffering. The sheer masochism of it…~~

Old Generation: "You were named after your grandfather."

Fri, 01 Jun 2012 10:23:26 -0500

Old Generation: "You were named after your grandfather."
Now Generation: "You were named after a celebrity."
Next Generation: "You were named after a fictional character."

sabrinamarceline: i wonder how many staff members at tumblr headquarters use missing-e behind david...

Fri, 01 Jun 2012 10:08:03 -0500

sabrinamarceline:

i wonder how many staff members at tumblr headquarters use missing-e behind david karp’s back

mytardishaswings: bortky: One Must Always Reblog When Fandoms...

Fri, 01 Jun 2012 08:48:13 -0500

mytardishaswings:

bortky:

One Must Always Reblog When Fandoms Save Each Other

The noise I am making right now is not possible!

philiponmycracker: bartyjoonyah:

Fri, 01 Jun 2012 05:22:21 -0500

philiponmycracker:

bartyjoonyah:

youknowyourebritishwhen: Came across this and thought of this...

Fri, 01 Jun 2012 04:37:09 -0500

youknowyourebritishwhen:

Came across this and thought of this blog :)

dannydibble: Miranda’s my spirit animal.

Fri, 01 Jun 2012 04:19:25 -0500

dannydibble:

Miranda’s my spirit animal.

whatatreacherousthing: I wear waistcoats now. Waistcoats are...

Fri, 01 Jun 2012 03:55:17 -0500

whatatreacherousthing:

I wear waistcoats now. Waistcoats are cool. [x]

This Sunday.

Fri, 01 Jun 2012 03:54:30 -0500

normal person: hay guise it's coronation day
ashes to ashes fan: HE DIDN'T DESERVE A SHALLOW GRAVE

To the Mycroft/Cake shippers, food porn takes on a whole new meaning.

Thu, 31 May 2012 22:07:47 -0500

snoopdong: Shhh do you hear that? It’s the sound of millions of suburban white teenage girls...

Thu, 31 May 2012 22:06:31 -0500

snoopdong:

Shhh

do you hear that?

It’s the sound of millions of suburban white teenage girls clicking away on facebook to prepare their “Summerr 2012 babyy” photo albums

enemiesandirony: ravengoodwoman: downtothelastbullet: greenet:...

Thu, 31 May 2012 22:05:31 -0500

enemiesandirony:

ravengoodwoman:

downtothelastbullet:

greenet:

tikaka:

clockworksexual:

iwoulddeduceyoutwice:

sugarkitteh:

bigbangpunch:

BRITISH VERSION OF THIS:

1. BOIL THE KETTLE - IF YOU HAVE TO USE A STOVE OR MICROWAVE SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOUR HOUSE

2. USE ANY WATER IN EXISTENCE - FUCK FILTERING THAT SHIT YOU DON’T HAVE TIME TO MAKE A PROFILE YOUR SHOW IS BACK ON IN 5 MINUTES PRESS A

3. THROW WHATEVER THE HELL TEABAG YOU HAVE IN THERE - FUCK LOOSE TEA THAT IS FOR WHEN YOU ORDER TEA OUTSIDE

4. USE YOUR STIRRING TEABAG METHOD OF CHOICE, ADD SUGAR/SWEETENER LIKE A BOSS OR NOT IF YOU ARE A HEALTHY BOSS

5. GRUMBLE LIKE A FISHERMAN BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO LEAVE THE KETTLE AREA TO GO TO THE FRIDGE TO GET MILK AND BACK TO IT AGAIN AFTER YOU ADD IT

6. RUN BACK TO WHATEVER YOU WERE DOING, TAKE A COMFORT SIP AND THEN EITHER FINISH IT OR FORGET ABOUT IT AND MOAN ABOUT THE FACT THAT YOU LET IT GO COLD

****

EDIT: IF YOU CAN’T SPOT IF NOT FROM THIS ALONE THEN THE NATURE OF MY TUMBLR THAT I’M NOT MAKING A DIG AT HER COMIC SIMPLY POINTING OUT HOW LAZY WE ARE OVER HERE WITH TEA THEN GET OFF THE INTERNET. THE COMIC COVERS ALL TEA OPTIONS. COME AT ME BRO.

THE AUSTRALIAN VERSION

JUST GET THE BLOODY BILLY ON THE FIRE AND THROW IN A FISTFUL OF TEA FOR EACH BUGGER AFTER THE WATER BOILS

TAKE OFF FIRE

WAIT UNTIL IT REACHES DESIRED STRENGTH

CAPABLE OF SUPPORTING A SPOON STOOD UPRIGHT IN IT IS IDEAL

WHACK BILLY TO ENCOURAGE SINKING OF TEA LEAVES

POUR IT OUT

ADD AS MUCH MILK AND SUGAR AS YOU LIKE OR NOT AT ALL ~~VEGEMITE IS ACCEPTABLE~~

DRINK IT DOWN WHILE RIDING OFF INTO THE OUTBACK ON YOUR BIG RED KANGAROO ON A SADDLE MADE OF DROPBEAR PELTS, WITH YOUR TRUSTY BRUMBY PACKING ALONG YOUR SWAG AND A DINGO BY YOUR SIDE

CHEERS MATE

CANADIAN VERSION

WHAT IS ENGLAND DOING?

OK NOW COPY THAT SHIT AND JUST CHANGE A FEW THINGS

NO PUSSY REAL “TEAWARE”, WE HAVE NORMAL COFFEE MUGS FOR THAT SHIT.

USE WHATEVER APPLIANCE YOU WANT TO HEAT THE DAMN WATER, YEAH WE SIGNED OUR FUCKING FREEDOM. NO ONE SAID IT WAS MANDATORY FOR KETTLES!

SIT LIKE A CLASSY MAN/WOMAN AND WAIT FOR IT TO BOIL

EAT SOME BACON

THROW A TEABAG IN THERE, LOOSE TEA IS FOR MY MONARCHIST AUNT.

DUMP SO MUCH SUGAR IN IT THAT YOU GET DIABETES AND SO MUCH MILK THAT YOU’RE GONNA HAVE TO GO OUTSIDE AND MILK THE COW, BETSY.

TAKE A SIP.

SCALD YOURSELF AND ALMOST DROP MUG, SPILLING IT DOWN THE FRONT OF YOUR BACK IN THE PROCESS.

REALIZE TEA ISN’T TOO MUCH OF YOUR THING AND GO BACK TO COFFEE.

AMERICAN VERSION

FIND A CUP(?) (ANY CLEAN, CUP-LIKE INSTRUMENT WILL WORK)

FILL IT WITH TAP WATER

ADD FIVE SPOONFULS OF INSTANT ICED TEA POWDER

STIR THAT SHIT SO HARD YOU SPILL SOME ON THE COUNTER, LET GO OF THE SPOON SO YOU CAN WATCH IT SPIN

DRINK IT AND CHOKE BECAUSE IT’S TOO SWEET

POUR SOME INTO THE SINK AND ADD WATER IN HOPES THAT IT WILL TASTE ACCEPTABLE

REPEAT UNTIL YOU GET IT RIGHT

ADD ICE CUBES AND A STRAW TO ENHANCE CLASSINESS

FINNISH VERSION

FUCK THE KETTLE, JUST TAKE THE PAIL FROM THE SAUNA

IF THE WATER ISN’T BOILING, YOU’RE DOING SOMETHING WRONG

TOSS THE BIRCH VIHTA IN THE WATER AND LET IT SEEP FOR A WHILE

GET A BOTTLE OF VODKA

DRINK THE VODKA

FORGET THE “TEA” UNTIL IT COOLS DOWN

RINSE YOUR NAKED BODY WITH THE BIRCH TEA

GO ROLL IN THE SNOW AND SCREAM FOR YOUR ANCIENT GODS

NORWEGIAN VERSION

BOIL WATER IN ELECTRIC KETTLE

TAKE OUT INSTANT COFFEE

DRINK COFFEE

…WHAT DO YOU MEAN “TEA”?

SOUTHERN VERSION

GET A POT AND PUT SOME WATER AND A BUNCH OF TEA BAGS IN THAT SONOFABITCH

BOIL THAT SHIT

PUT THAT SHIT IN A PITCHER

ADD SUGAR

KEEP ADDING SUGAR

NO, YOU’RE NOT DONE YET

WHEN THE SUGAR HAS REACHED ITS SATURATION POINT AND IS NO LONGER ACTUALLY DISSOLVING IN BOILING WATER THEN YOU’RE DONE

(i am not making this up i know people who make it that way)

FILL THE REST OF THAT SHIT UP WITH WATER AND PUT THAT MOTHERFUCKER IN THE ICEBOX

ENJOY THAT SHIT WITH A NICE TASTY PLATE OF DEEP-FRIED THINGS

YES

THAT IS EXACTLY HOW MY FATHER’s MOTHER MAKES HER SWEET TEA

(How in the world do I still have teeth, geez)

REAL AMERICAN VERSION

THROW TEA IN HARBOR

mynightmaresareaboutlosingyou: How can a man like John Green write something as gut-wrenchingly...

Thu, 31 May 2012 22:00:02 -0500

mynightmaresareaboutlosingyou:

How can a man like John Green write something as gut-wrenchingly heart-breaking as tfios

and then throw himself against a wall to test if he is an octopus

just

how

largerthanlifeus: consultingskeletontribute: somesortof-death-frisbee: imyouraziraphale: One two ...

Thu, 31 May 2012 21:59:33 -0500

largerthanlifeus:

consultingskeletontribute:

somesortof-death-frisbee:

imyouraziraphale:

One

two

three

four

I declare

a time war.

#five

#six

#seven

#eight

#daleks scream

#EXTER-MIN-ATE

Nine,

Ten,

Eleven,

Twelve.

The Doctor died,

and Silence Fell

Twelve,

Eleven,

Ten,

Nine.

Here he goes,

back in time.

jsmog: Canada’s teen birth and abortion rate drops by 36.9 per...

Thu, 31 May 2012 21:58:54 -0500

jsmog:

Canada’s teen birth and abortion rate drops by 36.9 per cent

Better access to contraception, higher quality sex education and shifting social norms have contributed to a 36.9 per cent decline in Canada’s teen birth and abortion rate between 1996 and 2006, according to a report released today by the Sex Information and Education Council of Canada.

America’s emphasis on abstinence-only sex ed “tends to result in a higher percentage of teens becoming pregnant,” as does the country’s lack of universal health care. Poverty is another factor.

Among the four countries compared for 2006, Canada boasted the lowest teen birth and abortion rate per 1,000 women aged 15 to 19 (27.9), followed by Sweden (31.4), England/Wales (60.3), and the United States (61.2).

dadiva18: lifeaccordingtokath: Adopt me you fantastic...

Thu, 31 May 2012 21:57:21 -0500

[Flash 10 is required to watch video.]

dadiva18:

lifeaccordingtokath:

Adopt me you fantastic twosome!

magyscorner:

Flawless couple.

CAN THEY BE MY DADS? PLEASE?!

Dear people who keep telling me that I'm pretty:

Thu, 31 May 2012 21:12:44 -0500

burtmacklin: quebradiza | harahiro | weeniehatgeneral why...

Thu, 31 May 2012 21:09:42 -0500

burtmacklin:

quebradiza | harahiro | weeniehatgeneral

why did i search spongebob on soundcloud

spongebob

#nothing in the world could have prepared me for that

caskettlover101: behavemindless: tyrajohnson: cloouds: LITERA...

Thu, 31 May 2012 21:05:02 -0500

[Flash 10 is required to watch video.]

caskettlover101:

behavemindless:

tyrajohnson:

cloouds:

LITERALLY DYING!

ILL NEVER GET TIRED OF THIS LOL LEGGO BITCH!

LMFAOOOOO. OH SHIT NIGGA, THERE GO THE PARTY. I love this so much.

OMFG!! IM DYING!!! THIS WAS SO FCKN FUNNY!!!

Fanfiction.net:

Thu, 31 May 2012 20:53:43 -0500

Chances of finding fanfic 100%

Chances of finding a good fanfic .0001%

Chances of finding a fanfic with good plot 46%

Chances of finding a grammatically correct fanfic with good plot .38%

Chances of being scarred for life 949,394,932%